{"id":2305,"title":"Solution 2 - Will Non-Computer Users Be Disadvantaged","advertisement_flag":false,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003eSoon people who cannot work with computers will be disadvantaged. To what extent do you agree or disagree with idea?\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/43-1-ielts-writing-sample-task-2-people-cannot-computer-disadvantaged\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eSolution 1\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/43-2-ielts-writing-sample-task-2-people-cannot-computer-disadvantaged\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eSolution 2\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-08T00:05:34.000Z","author_name":"Bob","tag_groups":["ielts-writing-part-2|IELTS Writing Part 2|false","ielts-writing-agree-or-disagree|IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree|false","ielts-writing|IELTS Writing|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"author_id":1,"slug":"43-2-ielts-writing-sample-task-2-people-cannot-computer-disadvantaged","parent_id":null,"visits":639,"likes":1,"image":null}
[]
[]
ielts-writing-part-2
[{"id":2306,"title":null,"advertisement_flag":false,"author_id":1,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003eComputers are the backbone of today’s world and will remain for the foreseeable future. People who have the knowledge of this gadget are believed to have some advantages over the others. It is a debatable topic which I am going to discuss both aspect of this topic. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eIn present world, life without a computer seems next to impossible. Mostly, persons who can operate this electronic device can get employment easily. It seems to be true when a person apply for job, always there is a column explicitly asking for computer knowledge. It is claimed that computer does the work fast and with no difficulty, since people can do calculation and access database very quickly by using ms-office tool. Moreover, there is a very less chance of error in work done with computers. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eMany people also think that our dependency on computers is increasing day by day which can be dangerous if the problems like y2k again come. They also said that it is not necessary that a person with skills of computers is always beneficiary and we can not judge a person capability on the basis of it. Many humans without the information about computer are still getting the jobs in 21st century. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eIn conclusion, the computers are used in almost every field. The competition for getting employment is growing very fast. To get a job, a person should have special traits in this world. In my opinion, computer knowledge is essential for every one. Without it, it is tough to survive in future. \u003c/p\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-08T00:05:34.000Z","author_name":"sandeep","tag_groups":[],"slug":null,"parent_id":2305,"visits":0,"likes":-1,"image":null},{"id":2308,"title":null,"advertisement_flag":false,"author_id":1,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003eWriting Tips:\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/how-can-i-improve-my-writing-skills\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eHow To Improve Writing Skills\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/what-required-ielts-writing\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eWhat Is Required In IELTS Writing\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/tips-ielts-vocabulary-writing\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eTips On IELTS Vocabulary For Writing\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/how-your-ielts-essays-are-graded\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eHow Your IELTS Essays Are Graded\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-08T03:55:44.000Z","author_name":"Bob","tag_groups":[],"slug":null,"parent_id":2305,"visits":0,"likes":-1,"image":null},{"id":2307,"title":null,"advertisement_flag":false,"author_id":1,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eCritique\u003c/i\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+TASK ACHIEVEMENT\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eYou wrote a very good essay. However, you were not able to achieve the task because you didn't show your stand. You did discuss both sides of the issue but didn't say whether you agree or disagree with the idea.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+LEXICAL RESOURCE\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eVocabulary varies and is flexible. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+COHERENCE AND COHESION\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThere are very few transition words used. The structure is clear.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eCompare to the original writing.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePERSONAL ADVICE: \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eI can get what you meant but you seemed not knowing how to express your ideas here: \u003c/li\u003e\n\u003c/ul\u003e\n\n\u003cblockquote\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"and will be remained for future\" -\u0026gt; \"will remain for the foreseeable future\" \u003c/p\u003e\n\u003c/blockquote\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eDo you think your sentence sounds redundant here: \"Some people think people who have the knowledge\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003ePlural: \"some \u003cb\u003eadvantage\u003c/b\u003e than the others\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eIn the introduction, you mentioned \"I am going to discuss both aspect of this topic\". However, bear in mind that you are supposed to show your stand on the topic. \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt might be a good idea not to refer to computers as \"gadgets.\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eUsing quotations as you did is not academic. \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003c/ul\u003e\n\n\u003cblockquote\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e“Life without computers is impossible” \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e“Do you have knowledge of computer?” \u003c/p\u003e\n\u003c/blockquote\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"So persons who can operate this electronic device\": never start a sentence with \"So\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"work\" is uncountable: Wrong \"a work\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"According to me\" sounds odd. You might want to check out \u003ca href=\"/questions/Expressing-Your-Opinion/18\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eExpressing Your Opinion\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003c/ul\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-08T04:40:56.000Z","author_name":"Bob","tag_groups":[],"slug":null,"parent_id":2305,"visits":0,"likes":-1,"image":null}]
[{"id":2621,"name":"Solution 1 - Mandatory Financial Education","short_content":"Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?\n\nSolution 1\n ...","likes":4,"slug":"101-1-financial-education-mandatory-component-school-program","tag_groups":["ielts-writing-part-2|IELTS Writing Part 2|false","ielts-writing-agree-or-disagree|IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree|false","ielts-writing|IELTS Writing|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":858,"name":"Speaking Partner - SANDEEP POONI","short_content":"Aim:\n\nI AM SIMPLE PERSON.\n\nAvailability:\n\n6AM TO 8AM\n\n9PM TO 11PM\n\nOnline:\n\nSKYPE: sandeep.pooni2\n ...","likes":9,"slug":"speaking-partner-sandeep-pooni","tag_groups":["english-skills-speaking-partner|English Skills - Speaking Partner|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":2624,"name":"Solution 1 - Children Born With Talents","short_content":"It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes ...","likes":4,"slug":"99-1-ielts-writing-generally-believed-people-born-talents","tag_groups":["ielts-writing-part-2|IELTS Writing Part 2|false","ielts-writing-discuss-and-give-opinion|IELTS Writing Discuss And Give Opinion|false","ielts-writing-opinion|IELTS Writing Opinion|false","ielts-writing|IELTS Writing|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":859,"name":"Speaking Partner - zooey nguyen","short_content":"Aim:\n\ni wanna pratice\n\nAvailability:\n\nall the time\n\nOnline:\n\nSKYPE: snowea93\n ...","likes":4,"slug":"speaking-partner-zooey-nguyen","tag_groups":["english-skills-speaking-partner|English Skills - Speaking Partner|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":2456,"name":"Solution 2 - Going Overseas For University Study","short_content":"Going overseas for university study is an exciting prospect for many people. But while it may offer some advantages, it is probably better to stay home ...","likes":1,"slug":"68-2-ielts-writing-sample-task-2-overseas-university-study-agree-disagree","tag_groups":["ielts-writing-part-2|IELTS Writing Part 2|false","ielts-writing-agree-or-disagree|IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree|false","ielts-writing|IELTS Writing|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null}]
main-forum
[{"id":70,"slug":"english-skills-listening","name":"English Skills - Listening","post_name":"News For English Skills - Listening"},{"id":72,"slug":"tips-learning-english","name":"Tips For Learning English","post_name":"News For Learning English"},{"id":73,"slug":"english-common-questions","name":"English Common Questions","post_name":"News For English Common Questions"},{"id":75,"slug":"ielts-speaking-part-1-samples","name":"IELTS Speaking Part 1 Samples","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Part 1 Samples"},{"id":76,"slug":"ielts-speaking-part-2-3-samples","name":"IELTS Speaking Part 2 \u0026 3 Samples","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Part 2 \u0026 3 Samples"},{"id":77,"slug":"ielts-speaking-samples-and-answers","name":"IELTS Speaking Samples And Answers","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Samples And Answers"},{"id":68,"slug":"ielts-listening-part-1","name":"IELTS Listening Part 1","post_name":"News For IELTS Listening Part 1"},{"id":74,"slug":"ielts-speaking-samples","name":"IELTS Speaking Samples","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Samples"},{"id":78,"slug":"english-skills-speaking-partner","name":"English Skills - Speaking Partner","post_name":"News For English Skills - Speaking Partner"},{"id":81,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-1-general","name":"IELTS Writing Part 1 General","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 1 General"},{"id":83,"slug":"ielts-writing-agree-or-disagree","name":"IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree"},{"id":84,"slug":"ielts-writing-discuss-and-give-opinion","name":"IELTS Writing Discuss And Give Opinion","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Discuss And Give Opinion"},{"id":85,"slug":"ielts-writing-opinion","name":"IELTS Writing Opinion","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Opinion"},{"id":82,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-1-academic","name":"IELTS Writing Part 1 Academic","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 1 Academic"},{"id":86,"slug":"ielts-writing-diagram-process","name":"IELTS Writing Diagram Process","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Diagram Process"},{"id":87,"slug":"ielts-writing-diagram-map","name":"IELTS Writing Diagram Map","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Diagram Map"},{"id":88,"slug":"ielts-writing-diagram-bar-chart","name":"IELTS Writing Diagram Bar Chart","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Diagram Bar Chart"},{"id":89,"slug":"ielts-writing-advantages-disadvantages","name":"IELTS Writing Advantages Disadvantages","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Advantages Disadvantages"},{"id":90,"slug":"ielts-writing","name":"IELTS Writing","post_name":"IELTS Writing News"},{"id":91,"slug":"ielts-listening","name":"IELTS Listening","post_name":"IELTS Listening News"},{"id":79,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-1","name":"IELTS Writing Part 1","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 1"},{"id":69,"slug":"ielts-listening-part-2","name":"IELTS Listening Part 2","post_name":"News For IELTS Listening Part 2"},{"id":80,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-2","name":"IELTS Writing Part 2","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 2"},{"id":92,"slug":"ielts-writing-graphs","name":"IELTS Writing Graphs","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Graphs"},{"id":93,"slug":"ielts-academic-writing","name":"IELTS Academic Writing","post_name":"News For IELTS Academic Writing"}]
Computers are the backbone of today’s world and will remain for the foreseeable future. People who have the knowledge of this gadget are believed to have some advantages over the others. It is a debatable topic which I am going to discuss both aspect of this topic.
In present world, life without a computer seems next to impossible. Mostly, persons who can operate this electronic device can get employment easily. It seems to be true when a person apply for job, always there is a column explicitly asking for computer knowledge. It is claimed that computer does the work fast and with no difficulty, since people can do calculation and access database very quickly by using ms-office tool. Moreover, there is a very less chance of error in work done with computers.
Many people also think that our dependency on computers is increasing day by day which can be dangerous if the problems like y2k again come. They also said that it is not necessary that a person with skills of computers is always beneficiary and we can not judge a person capability on the basis of it. Many humans without the information about computer are still getting the jobs in 21st century.
In conclusion, the computers are used in almost every field. The competition for getting employment is growing very fast. To get a job, a person should have special traits in this world. In my opinion, computer knowledge is essential for every one. Without it, it is tough to survive in future.
You wrote a very good essay. However, you were not able to achieve the task because you didn't show your stand. You did discuss both sides of the issue but didn't say whether you agree or disagree with the idea.
+LEXICAL RESOURCE
Vocabulary varies and is flexible.
+COHERENCE AND COHESION
There are very few transition words used. The structure is clear.
+GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY
Compare to the original writing.
PERSONAL ADVICE:
I can get what you meant but you seemed not knowing how to express your ideas here:
"and will be remained for future" -> "will remain for the foreseeable future"
Do you think your sentence sounds redundant here: "Some people think people who have the knowledge"
Plural: "some advantage than the others"
In the introduction, you mentioned "I am going to discuss both aspect of this topic". However, bear in mind that you are supposed to show your stand on the topic.
It might be a good idea not to refer to computers as "gadgets."
Using quotations as you did is not academic.
“Life without computers is impossible”
“Do you have knowledge of computer?”
"So persons who can operate this electronic device": never start a sentence with "So"
