{"id":2644,"title":"Solution 1 - Internet In Formal Education","advertisement_flag":false,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003eUniversity lecturer is now able to put their lectures on the internet for students to read and so the importance of attending face to face lectures has been reduced. Do you believe the use of internet in formal education is a good idea? What future effects will internet have on academic study? \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/105-1-ielts-writing-university-lecturer-now-able-put-their-lectures-internet\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eSolution 1\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-13T23:46:40.000Z","author_name":"Bob","tag_groups":["ielts-writing-part-2|IELTS Writing Part 2|false","ielts-writing|IELTS Writing|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"author_id":1,"slug":"105-1-ielts-writing-university-lecturer-now-able-put-their-lectures-internet","parent_id":null,"visits":1947,"likes":1,"image":null}
[]
[]
ielts-writing-part-2
[{"id":2645,"title":null,"advertisement_flag":false,"author_id":1,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003eThe effects of the Internet is not only limited to the enhanced accessibility of data and information, but it has gone beyond the unexpected. One of the most overt effects of the Internet is on education. Today, teachers make use of the internet to post lectures and even assignments, thus reducing the need to have classroom-base and face to face lectures. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eI believe that the aid of the internet to formal education is really of great help. The reason is that students can visit their lecture site anytime they want to regardless of where they are, thus providing them convenience in studying and allowing them to do other things like part-time works and the like. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eIn addition, the use of online services for posting lectures helps the students to understand clearly the lessons taught. Mostly, lecturers can insert web links to the full definition of words which can be very confusing to many students, or the essential contents of lessons that need to be studied thoroughly. In that way, students can be challenge to study further, thus letting the students to become fully aware of the lessons posted. Moreover, the use of internet for posting lectures can also minimise the use of paper and photocopy machines, then preservation of energy and woods is very much possible. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eHowever, in my own opinion the usage of internet in the long run can lead to negative effects. Since students and lecturers would rely on the internet heavily, it is more likely that some students may become “lazy learners”. Moreover, the universities might close temporarily or even permanently since the internet for academic study can be popular and widespread. This may even lead to the ignorance of many people to the real meaning and purpose of schools. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFurthermore, the evaluation of students can alter. Teachers may not fully see or observe if the students are learning from the lessons or not. It can also be possible for some students to let other persons answer their school tasks, so assessment of students may not be that accurate and reliable. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eTo sum up, the Internet has great effects on academic learning if utilised in the proper, right and wise way. Gaining education cannot fully depend with the utilisation of internet, yet it can only be one of the factors that could help with the progression of learning and teaching. \u003c/p\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-13T23:46:40.000Z","author_name":"sheeneeyoo","tag_groups":[],"slug":null,"parent_id":2644,"visits":0,"likes":-1,"image":null},{"id":2647,"title":null,"advertisement_flag":false,"author_id":1,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003eWriting Tips:\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/how-can-i-improve-my-writing-skills\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eHow To Improve Writing Skills\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/what-required-ielts-writing\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eWhat Is Required In IELTS Writing\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/tips-ielts-vocabulary-writing\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eTips On IELTS Vocabulary For Writing\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"/d/how-your-ielts-essays-are-graded\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003eHow Your IELTS Essays Are Graded\u003c/a\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-14T02:29:29.000Z","author_name":"Bob","tag_groups":[],"slug":null,"parent_id":2644,"visits":0,"likes":-1,"image":null},{"id":2646,"title":null,"advertisement_flag":false,"author_id":1,"content":"\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eCritique\u003c/i\u003e\u003c/b\u003e\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+TASK ACHIEVEMENT\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eYou were not able to achieve the task because you didn't show whether the use of the internet in formal education is a good idea and What future effects the internet will have on academic study.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+LEXICAL RESOURCE\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eVocabulary is very weak and there were many errors in expressing ideas.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+COHERENCE AND COHESION\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eParagraphs are poorly organised with incomplete ones.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e+GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eCompare to the original writing.\u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePERSONAL ADVICE: \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eArticle \"the\": \"The effects of internet\" -\u0026gt; \"The effects of the Internet\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eWrong in meaning: \"The effects of internet is not only limited for accessing data and information\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003c/ul\u003e\n\n\u003cblockquote\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ean effect is something that is produced by an agency or cause. In your sentence, it's more about the usage of the Internet. \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003enext the word \"for\" is used inappropriately. In this context, you should have used \"to.\" \u003c/p\u003e\n\u003c/blockquote\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"not only\" should be used with \"but also\" (in your introduction.) \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou'd better use \"the need\" not \"the chance\" because of the incorrect meaning: \"thus reducing the chance of a classroom-base and face to face lectures\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eProblem in using Singular and plural at the same time: \"a classroom-base and face to face lectures\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003c/ul\u003e\n\n\u003cblockquote\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"a\" is for singular nouns \u003c/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eYou then used \"lectures\" (plural) \u003c/p\u003e\n\u003c/blockquote\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"I say so\" is totally non academic. \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003ePossession shouldn't be used here and the article \"the\" was wrongly used: \"the lecture’s site\" -\u0026gt; \"lecture sites\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eA paragraph shouldn't comprise of only 2 sentences. \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"the lecturer can insert web links for the full definition\": which lecturer? did you mention earlier? \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe noun is plural, why did you use \"needs\"? \"essential contents of the lesson that needs\" \u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cp\u003e\"In generalization\"???\u003c/p\u003e\u003c/li\u003e\n\u003c/ul\u003e\n","created_at":"2012-06-14T02:43:58.000Z","author_name":"Bob","tag_groups":[],"slug":null,"parent_id":2644,"visits":0,"likes":-1,"image":null}]
[{"id":2618,"name":"Solution 2 - Living In A House Or An Apartment","short_content":"Some people prefer to live in a house, while others think that there are more advantages living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadva ...","likes":4,"slug":"100-2-people-prefer-live-house-advantages-apartment","tag_groups":["ielts-writing-part-2|IELTS Writing Part 2|false","ielts-writing-opinion|IELTS Writing Opinion|false","ielts-writing-advantages-disadvantages|IELTS Writing Advantages Disadvantages|false","ielts-writing|IELTS Writing|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":1933,"name":"Study English - Series 1, Episode 4: Rising Dollar","short_content":"Source: Youtube\n\nThis is only the audio file. We are implementing transcripts and questions\n\nfor this section which will help you examine your understa ...","likes":1,"slug":"study-english-series-1-episode-4-rising-dollar","tag_groups":["ielts-listening-part-2|IELTS Listening Part 2|false","english-skills-listening|English Skills - Listening|false","ielts-listening|IELTS Listening|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":1934,"name":"Study English - Series 1, Episode 5: Global Warming","short_content":"Source: Youtube\n\nThis is only the audio file. We are implementing transcripts and questions\n\nfor this section which will help you examine your understa ...","likes":8,"slug":"study-english-series-1-episode-5-global-warming","tag_groups":["ielts-listening-part-2|IELTS Listening Part 2|false","english-skills-listening|English Skills - Listening|false","ielts-listening|IELTS Listening|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":1935,"name":"Study English - Series 1, Episode 6: Greenhouse Gases","short_content":"Source: Youtube\n\nThis is only the audio file. We are implementing transcripts and questions\n\nfor this section which will help you examine your understa ...","likes":0,"slug":"study-english-series-1-episode-6-greenhouse-gases","tag_groups":["ielts-listening-part-2|IELTS Listening Part 2|false","english-skills-listening|English Skills - Listening|false","ielts-listening|IELTS Listening|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null},{"id":860,"name":"Speaking Partner - ivy gacayan","short_content":"Aim:\n\ni am looking forward to speak to someone using the English language for me to enhance more my skills \\\n\nAvailability:\n\n10:00 am- 12:00 noon\n\n1:00 ...","likes":2,"slug":"speaking-partner-ivy-gacayan","tag_groups":["english-skills-speaking-partner|English Skills - Speaking Partner|false","ielts-academic-writing|IELTS Academic Writing|false"],"image":null}]
main-forum
[{"id":70,"slug":"english-skills-listening","name":"English Skills - Listening","post_name":"News For English Skills - Listening"},{"id":72,"slug":"tips-learning-english","name":"Tips For Learning English","post_name":"News For Learning English"},{"id":73,"slug":"english-common-questions","name":"English Common Questions","post_name":"News For English Common Questions"},{"id":75,"slug":"ielts-speaking-part-1-samples","name":"IELTS Speaking Part 1 Samples","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Part 1 Samples"},{"id":76,"slug":"ielts-speaking-part-2-3-samples","name":"IELTS Speaking Part 2 \u0026 3 Samples","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Part 2 \u0026 3 Samples"},{"id":77,"slug":"ielts-speaking-samples-and-answers","name":"IELTS Speaking Samples And Answers","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Samples And Answers"},{"id":68,"slug":"ielts-listening-part-1","name":"IELTS Listening Part 1","post_name":"News For IELTS Listening Part 1"},{"id":74,"slug":"ielts-speaking-samples","name":"IELTS Speaking Samples","post_name":"News For IELTS Speaking Samples"},{"id":78,"slug":"english-skills-speaking-partner","name":"English Skills - Speaking Partner","post_name":"News For English Skills - Speaking Partner"},{"id":81,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-1-general","name":"IELTS Writing Part 1 General","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 1 General"},{"id":83,"slug":"ielts-writing-agree-or-disagree","name":"IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Agree Or Disagree"},{"id":84,"slug":"ielts-writing-discuss-and-give-opinion","name":"IELTS Writing Discuss And Give Opinion","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Discuss And Give Opinion"},{"id":85,"slug":"ielts-writing-opinion","name":"IELTS Writing Opinion","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Opinion"},{"id":82,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-1-academic","name":"IELTS Writing Part 1 Academic","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 1 Academic"},{"id":86,"slug":"ielts-writing-diagram-process","name":"IELTS Writing Diagram Process","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Diagram Process"},{"id":87,"slug":"ielts-writing-diagram-map","name":"IELTS Writing Diagram Map","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Diagram Map"},{"id":88,"slug":"ielts-writing-diagram-bar-chart","name":"IELTS Writing Diagram Bar Chart","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Diagram Bar Chart"},{"id":89,"slug":"ielts-writing-advantages-disadvantages","name":"IELTS Writing Advantages Disadvantages","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Advantages Disadvantages"},{"id":90,"slug":"ielts-writing","name":"IELTS Writing","post_name":"IELTS Writing News"},{"id":91,"slug":"ielts-listening","name":"IELTS Listening","post_name":"IELTS Listening News"},{"id":79,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-1","name":"IELTS Writing Part 1","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 1"},{"id":69,"slug":"ielts-listening-part-2","name":"IELTS Listening Part 2","post_name":"News For IELTS Listening Part 2"},{"id":80,"slug":"ielts-writing-part-2","name":"IELTS Writing Part 2","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Part 2"},{"id":92,"slug":"ielts-writing-graphs","name":"IELTS Writing Graphs","post_name":"News For IELTS Writing Graphs"},{"id":93,"slug":"ielts-academic-writing","name":"IELTS Academic Writing","post_name":"News For IELTS Academic Writing"}]
University lecturer is now able to put their lectures on the internet for students to read and so the importance of attending face to face lectures has been reduced. Do you believe the use of internet in formal education is a good idea? What future effects will internet have on academic study?
The effects of the Internet is not only limited to the enhanced accessibility of data and information, but it has gone beyond the unexpected. One of the most overt effects of the Internet is on education. Today, teachers make use of the internet to post lectures and even assignments, thus reducing the need to have classroom-base and face to face lectures.
I believe that the aid of the internet to formal education is really of great help. The reason is that students can visit their lecture site anytime they want to regardless of where they are, thus providing them convenience in studying and allowing them to do other things like part-time works and the like.
In addition, the use of online services for posting lectures helps the students to understand clearly the lessons taught. Mostly, lecturers can insert web links to the full definition of words which can be very confusing to many students, or the essential contents of lessons that need to be studied thoroughly. In that way, students can be challenge to study further, thus letting the students to become fully aware of the lessons posted. Moreover, the use of internet for posting lectures can also minimise the use of paper and photocopy machines, then preservation of energy and woods is very much possible.
However, in my own opinion the usage of internet in the long run can lead to negative effects. Since students and lecturers would rely on the internet heavily, it is more likely that some students may become “lazy learners”. Moreover, the universities might close temporarily or even permanently since the internet for academic study can be popular and widespread. This may even lead to the ignorance of many people to the real meaning and purpose of schools.
Furthermore, the evaluation of students can alter. Teachers may not fully see or observe if the students are learning from the lessons or not. It can also be possible for some students to let other persons answer their school tasks, so assessment of students may not be that accurate and reliable.
To sum up, the Internet has great effects on academic learning if utilised in the proper, right and wise way. Gaining education cannot fully depend with the utilisation of internet, yet it can only be one of the factors that could help with the progression of learning and teaching.
You were not able to achieve the task because you didn't show whether the use of the internet in formal education is a good idea and What future effects the internet will have on academic study.
+LEXICAL RESOURCE
Vocabulary is very weak and there were many errors in expressing ideas.
+COHERENCE AND COHESION
Paragraphs are poorly organised with incomplete ones.
+GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY
Compare to the original writing.
PERSONAL ADVICE:
Article "the": "The effects of internet" -> "The effects of the Internet"
Wrong in meaning: "The effects of internet is not only limited for accessing data and information"
an effect is something that is produced by an agency or cause. In your sentence, it's more about the usage of the Internet.
next the word "for" is used inappropriately. In this context, you should have used "to."
"not only" should be used with "but also" (in your introduction.)
You'd better use "the need" not "the chance" because of the incorrect meaning: "thus reducing the chance of a classroom-base and face to face lectures"
Problem in using Singular and plural at the same time: "a classroom-base and face to face lectures"
"a" is for singular nouns
You then used "lectures" (plural)
"I say so" is totally non academic.
Possession shouldn't be used here and the article "the" was wrongly used: "the lecture’s site" -> "lecture sites"
A paragraph shouldn't comprise of only 2 sentences.
"the lecturer can insert web links for the full definition": which lecturer? did you mention earlier?
The noun is plural, why did you use "needs"? "essential contents of the lesson that needs"
