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IELTS Writing Sample

Will Non-Computer Users Be Disadvantaged

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IELTS Writing Sample - Task 2 Go To Sample

Soon people who cannot work with computers will be disadvantaged. To what extent do you agree or disagree with idea?

How many words? How long?

One Possible Solution: (Nothing is perfect! Please take this as an example only!)

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Over the past decades, computing technology has been going through an unbelievable development. Today possessing desktop or portable computers which are frequently used to surf the Internet or just to work is the norm of the society. Thus, I agree with the statement that people who cannot work with them will be disadvantaged. This argument will be proven by considering how computer science has changed our everyday life and why it is required for our work.



Firstly, information technology and the advent of the Internet have made sweeping changes in people’s life. For instance, we spend a fair amount of time in front of the computer not just for entertainment purposes, but also for managing bank accounts, buying household items and keeping contact with the extended family and friends. Hence, it can be seen that having a personal computer provide us many new opportunities as well as making our life easier. From this point of view, it is clear that non-computer users will experience a huge drawback sooner or later.

In addition, almost every job requires the proper use of these machines. For example, as a secretary, one needs to be familiar with office equipments such as multifunction printers, copiers, fax machines and certainly with many popular software products such as Word, Excel. As a result, it is acknowledged that the mentioned skills are needed in a number of circumstances. In other words, the disadvantages that non-users are facing in the labour market are clear.

In conclusion, the degree that information technology has changed our life and working environment is significant. Therefore, it has been proven that people who are not catching up with the development will be disadvantaged. Thus, trying to get familiar with computers is recommended.

This writing is found under the following category(ies):
Agree or Disagree  
Critique
This critique is meant for the writing from katehell. This writing task has been reviewed and partially corrected. Please revert to the original IELTS writing before correction to understand this critique!

+TASK ACHIEVEMENT
You were able to achieve the task by showing whether you agree or disagree with the statement.

+LEXICAL RESOURCE
Vocabulary is varied: advent, fair amount of, non-computer users, drawback, multifunction, household.

+COHERENCE AND COHESION
There are a number of transition words used: thus, from this point of view, as a result, in addition, in conclusion.
The structure is very clear.

+GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY
Grammatical errors have been corrected such as wrong usage of "the", subject verb agreement, abbreviations.

PERSONAL ADVICE:
+Please consider this phrase "looking at how computer science has both changed our everyday life and is required for our work". It's wrong because if you say "has both changed" at the beginning, you should also use present perfect after "and".
+pay more attention to the usage of "the"
+subject verb agreement is not totally correct
+try to avoid "some", "so on": In academic writing, everything must be concrete and clear.
+work is correct. Works in your writing is incorrect.
+don't use abbreviations such as PC in your writing.
+try to use academic words and more passive sentences.
+The only time you should use “for one” by itself to give an example of something is when you have earlier mentioned a class to which the example belongs: “There are a lot of reasons I don’t want your old car. For one, there are squirrels living in the upholstery.” (One reason.)



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IELTS Writing Sample

Mandatory Financial Education

IELTS Writing Sample - Task 2

Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Go To Sample

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+Introduction:
I agree with the statement that people who cannot work with them will be disadvantaged.

+Supporting Idea 1: How computer science has changed our everyday life.

+Supporting Idea 2: Why it is required for our work.

IELTS Writing Word Count and IELTS Writing Time

IELTS Writing Task 1:
Timing: 20 minutes
Minimum word count: 150

IELTS Writing Task 2:
Timing: 40 minutes
Minimum word count: 250

IELTS Writing Sample - Task 1

There are 2 different formats. One is for the Academic module and the other is for the General module. However, for both modules, you will have to produce a writing of 150 words based on the given information.
IELTS Writing Task 1 - General Module
You are supposed to write a letter.
IELTS Writing Task 1 - Academic Module
You will be given a task based on some pictorial or graphic information. You have to describe the information provided.
For More Details: IELTS Writing Task 1

IELTS Writing Sample - Task 2

This task is more difficult than IELTS Writing Task 1
You have to write at least 250 words and, as Task 2 is longer than Task 1, you are advised to spend approximately 40 minutes on this task and 20 minutes on the first task.
You are expected to produce a writing on a given topic and to organise your answer correctly, giving some examples to support your ideas.
For More Details: IELTS Writing Task 2

Give your writing a good structure

1) Introduction is a must. You don't believe you could get a good grade without introduction, do you?

2) Body: 3 paragraphs are also necessary. Three is a magical number. It can do wonders to your overall band score.

3) Conclusion. You do not want to infuse your examiner with a feeling of incompleteness.

A Good Outline before you write is essential

What you are going to write in your essay? Write down the key ideas as short as possible.

An outline sample
Introduction - Topic and opinion in short
Paragraph 1 - staff working conditions are important
Paragraph 2 - employers should research and improve the working conditions
Paragraph 3 - concentrating more on their product is bad
Conclusion - Short summary of paragraphs

How will your essay look like?

Is it everything?

No, the structure you have just seen is a structure for an opinion essay.

What does it mean?

It means there are many different types of essays. If you go through our website, you can see that under IELTS Writing Task 1 and Task 2, there are different categories.
You need to go through each of them and study the structure for the particular writing type.

I do know the structure of an IELTS Writing but why I didn't score high in the exam?

There are many reasons. One of the many reasons is lacking of linking words.
Did you use linking words?
They would make your structure clearer and therefore improve your overal score.

Linking Words or Transitional Words

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This is how your essay is graded

There are 4 components: Task Response, Coherence and Cohesion, Lexical Resource, Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

Task Response means to what extend your essay covers the topic. For example, if the topic is "The advantages and disadvantages of globalization", you would have to write about both aspects not just only advantages or just only disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion means how well your paragraphs and sentences are connected. If your first paragraph is about advantages of globalisation, you should start your second paragraph with phrases such as "Despite the advantages, there are many disadvantages we should be aware of". Otherwise, your essay is just a list of items which are not related to each other.

Lexical Resource means vocabulary and different types of sentences, simple and complex. You should be able to demonstrate your capability in using English.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy means spelling and grammar of sentences. You should be able to spell the words correctly, do not forget articles “a” and “the”, punctuations is also important.

One more important thing to know: the four criteria are equally weighted. It means that if you forgot about “Coherence and Cohesion” in your essay, you will loose 1/4 of your essay points.