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1)Internet In Formal Education
2)Increasing Crime And What Governments Can Do
3)Prevention Is Better Than Cure
4)Happiness In Life
5)Several Languages Die Every Year

IELTS Writing Sample

Children Playing Less With One Another

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IELTS Writing Sample - Task 2 Go To Sample

Nowadays, children play less with one another and this has an impact on their development. What are the reasons for this? Does it have a good or a bad effect on children?

How many words? How long?

One Possible Solution: (Nothing is perfect! Please take this as an example only!)

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In the prevailing scenario, it can be commonly seen all around the globe that children spend more time with gadgets and gizmos, instead of playing with their peers. There are quite a few possible reasons behind this such as technology and parent's insecurity. Many consider this attitude as a negative effect on children. However, from my understanding, it has a significant number of benefits which are discussed in the further paragraphs.

In order to justify my point of view, I would like to state that technology has played an indispensable role to keep children busy at their home. For instance, children in India especially in metropolitan cities spend a huge amount of time on surfing the Internet and playing play station games. With respect to that, they enhance and accentuate their intellectual skills; while acquiring more knowledge from the internet and moreover using keyboard booms the coordination and movement of fingers. Besides this, the highly sophisticated play stations encourage them to do more physical movements, thereby keeping them physically fit. Therefore, it is clear from the above example that technology is one reason through which children spend less time with each other.

Furthermore, it is believed that the contemporary world is not a safe place for anyone. In today's busy world, parents have very less time or no time to keep an eye on their kids. Take India, for instance, mostly parents are working and children are always instructed not to go out to meet with the friends because parents know that most of the time their children learn some bad habits from their fellow age groups. Apart from this, parents feel insecure about any miss-happening with their kids such as kid-napping, as these are common in India. Thus it can be clearly seen from the example that parents also are the another reason for this behavior of children.

However, some people argued that this leads to many negative effects, such as children's losing interaction, which is the base of their development. However, I am at the variance of this because children fill this gap by interacting with each other through social networking websites.

Keeping in mind all the above, I would like to conclude that we all are living in a techno savvy world, which blessed our children with enormous websites to fulfill the physical requirements as well as intellectual ones of their body, while staying safe from the outer world.

This writing is found under the following category(ies):
IELTS Opinion Essays  
Critique
This critique is meant for the writing from kailash. This writing task has been reviewed and partially corrected. Please revert to the original IELTS writing before correction to understand this critique!

+TASK ACHIEVEMENT
You were fully able to achieve the task by showing the reason for the trend and your opinion on whether it's good or bad to children.
+LEXICAL RESOURCE
Vocabulary is good.

+COHERENCE AND COHESION
Paragraphs are well organised.

+GRAMMATICAL RANGE AND ACCURACY
Compare to the original writing.

PERSONAL ADVICE:
+ "Well, there are so many reasons behind this": I'm not going to say this is wrong but it sounds more like in daily conversations. You should avoid using phrases expressing your personal feeling.
+ "so many reasons behind this": Since this is the second time I checked your writing, I notice you like to use "so many" which is not wrong but not academic. There are various ways to express that.
+ Why did you use quotation in this: reasons behind this; "such as technology and parent's insecurity".
> I couldn't find any reason for using that.
+ "a negative effects on children": is it plural or singular?
+ "however, as per my notion it has a significant number ..." should be put into a separate sentence.
+ Some of my friends frequently use this phrase "as per my notion". However, it's not what local people actually use in Australia. I guess this happens to all languages, especially English since different countries have different accents and slangs.
+ "I would like to state that,technology has play an": you shouldn't use comma here.
+ Present Perfect: "technology has play an indispensable role" -> "technology has played an indispensable role"
+ Your writing is more like spoken English. You should avoid this because it pulls your mark down.
> "children in India especially in metropolitan cities they spend huge amount of time on surfing internet and playing play station games": where is the subject? where is the verb? Answering these questions helps you understand why I said it's like spoken English.
+ "spend huge amount of time" -> "spend a huge amount of time"
+ "surfing internet" -> "surfing the Internet"
+ Subject Verb Agreement: "using keyboard boom the coordination and movement of fingers"
+ Wrong "the utmost busiest world"
+ The way you used "because" in "Because parents know that most ..." is wrong
> Example: I didn't go to class because it was raining heavily.
=> You need to give 2 clauses.
+ "feel insecurity" -> "feel insecure"
+ You shouldn't use "the" here because you didn't mention it earlier: "leads to the negative effects"



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IELTS Writing Sample

Mandatory Financial Education

IELTS Writing Sample - Task 2

Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
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We are updating this writing outline. Please come back later!

IELTS Writing Word Count and IELTS Writing Time

IELTS Writing Task 1:
Timing: 20 minutes
Minimum word count: 150

IELTS Writing Task 2:
Timing: 40 minutes
Minimum word count: 250

IELTS Writing Sample - Task 1

There are 2 different formats. One is for the Academic module and the other is for the General module. However, for both modules, you will have to produce a writing of 150 words based on the given information.
IELTS Writing Task 1 - General Module
You are supposed to write a letter.
IELTS Writing Task 1 - Academic Module
You will be given a task based on some pictorial or graphic information. You have to describe the information provided.
For More Details: IELTS Writing Task 1

IELTS Writing Sample - Task 2

This task is more difficult than IELTS Writing Task 1
You have to write at least 250 words and, as Task 2 is longer than Task 1, you are advised to spend approximately 40 minutes on this task and 20 minutes on the first task.
You are expected to produce a writing on a given topic and to organise your answer correctly, giving some examples to support your ideas.
For More Details: IELTS Writing Task 2

Give your writing a good structure

1) Introduction is a must. You don't believe you could get a good grade without introduction, do you?

2) Body: 3 paragraphs are also necessary. Three is a magical number. It can do wonders to your overall band score.

3) Conclusion. You do not want to infuse your examiner with a feeling of incompleteness.

A Good Outline before you write is essential

What you are going to write in your essay? Write down the key ideas as short as possible.

An outline sample
Introduction - Topic and opinion in short
Paragraph 1 - staff working conditions are important
Paragraph 2 - employers should research and improve the working conditions
Paragraph 3 - concentrating more on their product is bad
Conclusion - Short summary of paragraphs

How will your essay look like?

Is it everything?

No, the structure you have just seen is a structure for an opinion essay.

What does it mean?

It means there are many different types of essays. If you go through our website, you can see that under IELTS Writing Task 1 and Task 2, there are different categories.
You need to go through each of them and study the structure for the particular writing type.

I do know the structure of an IELTS Writing but why I didn't score high in the exam?

There are many reasons. One of the many reasons is lacking of linking words.
Did you use linking words?
They would make your structure clearer and therefore improve your overal score.

Linking Words or Transitional Words

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This is how your essay is graded

There are 4 components: Task Response, Coherence and Cohesion, Lexical Resource, Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

Task Response means to what extend your essay covers the topic. For example, if the topic is "The advantages and disadvantages of globalization", you would have to write about both aspects not just only advantages or just only disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion means how well your paragraphs and sentences are connected. If your first paragraph is about advantages of globalisation, you should start your second paragraph with phrases such as "Despite the advantages, there are many disadvantages we should be aware of". Otherwise, your essay is just a list of items which are not related to each other.

Lexical Resource means vocabulary and different types of sentences, simple and complex. You should be able to demonstrate your capability in using English.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy means spelling and grammar of sentences. You should be able to spell the words correctly, do not forget articles “a” and “the”, punctuations is also important.

One more important thing to know: the four criteria are equally weighted. It means that if you forgot about “Coherence and Cohesion” in your essay, you will loose 1/4 of your essay points.